Garden Power – exploring the joy of gardens in everyday life

21 December 202221 December 2022 / Waves and Pebbles - random thoughts and writing on life, memories and creativity / 5 Comments

Yesterday I felt as if I was somehow being sent a message when a book about life stories led to a person’s history involving flowers. Today I was reflecting on the benefits of gardens and what a difference they make to our lives in so many different ways and the book title Garden Power just popped into my mind. So for now it is a new book project and I will see where it takes me. It might end up getting shelved for a year or so while it bubbles in the background of my mind.

I have my own life stories about gardens from my childhood and life experiences but I really want to delve deeper and go wider. To think about the impact of nature in our lives, the benefits of being surrounded by living plants, birds and animals – our own private – or not so private – space across a spectrum from wild to manicured.

To also consider what it is like to not have a garden especially during the lockdowns of 2020. I myself was able to venture into vegetable growing for the first time since my twenties and it was the film location for a spot of TikTok dancing. I also made friends with a little Robin and listened to the early morning birdsong.

Let me hasten to add, I am not a gardener but I do love gardens. This has much to do with my mum who was an avid gardener, spending many hours of toil to bring the joys of a colourful array of flowers to long summer days.

Even when I was in hospital with leukaemia I recall the simple pleasure of being able to walk out into a private garden by the Macmillan ward, tended to by volunteers, and look up to the sky, hear the birdsong and breathe in the fresh air. Magic in a world that had shrunk unexpectedly. Returning home, a bouquet of flowers greeted me.

For now, I will ponder on the title and another one that has come to me … The Everyday Life of Flowers. What stories would you tell?

en plein air – my little piece of country by the sea

13 June 2020 / Waves and Pebbles - random thoughts and writing on life, memories and creativity / Leave a comment

My little piece of country … Copyright Kay Underdown/WavesandPebbles 2018

I’ve just discovered this unfinished post that I left hanging around in my WordPress blog waiting to be finished back in 2018. I had only just started the words but the title and photo are very relevant to me now, in June 2020 during the UK lockdown. This is now where I spend most of my time when I am outdoors.

I painted this picture back in 2018 when my artist friend Stewart suggested I go to the local beach and paint en plein air. Not being a painter, I was somewhat horrified at the suggestion, the thought of people watching my childlike attempts to paint. Yet I loved the essence of painting outdoors. So I set up a table in my garden, retrieved paints from the shed, a cheap canvas I had purchased with good intentions some while back and sat down to paint.

I became totally absorbed for what must have been a couple of hours. I enjoyed selecting and swirling around the colours and actually seeing my garden from a different perspective. By the end, it gave me a good feeling and now sits in my conservatory, a happy reminder of that time and maybe the picture will remain with me as a memory of where I lived whenever I may move on in the future.

It may not be a work of art, and I should have known when to stop as I decided to add more layers, but if you have never tried painting or drawing in your garden, or even indoors in your home (there is another blog on here when I started sketching my lounge) then I do urge you to have a go and see how it makes you feel and it is a wonderful way to capture memories.

Only this week I had a one to one art class for the first time on Zoom. I was amazed that I actually managed to draw some fruit that resembled in some way what it was. Using the Zoom platform worked really well. It took some thought beforehand how to arrange everything so my teacher could see what I was doing and I could watch her but it led to a very relaxed and enjoyable session. Towards the end we explored a fun way of mixing watercolours to result in a visual guide to the different shades that could be achieved.

During my lesson, I showed my new teacher a small piece of art I created that is very special to me. It is what I consider a childlike picture of a house on the beach, a depiction of a dream I had some years back of wanting to live by the sea (now achieved in 2017). The picture led her to talk to me about the genre of Naive Art, a term I had never heard of, that is described by the National Association of Naive Artists as “a simplistic charm and humorous vitality … created all over the world, by men and women from all walks of life, who have had no formal training” (www.britishnaives.co.uk). She also showed me a wonderful book of such art and I am now intrigued to discover more about it and maybe it is something that I can aspire to. Membership of the Association is by a submission process but there is a Facebook group which I believe is open to anyone to apply to join.

My seaside dream Copyright Kay Underdown 2020

I have found the lockdown to be a time for reflection, an opportunity to explore different avenues and to focus on what is important to me. Having said that, it has not been the easiest time to concentrate or to be creative with my writing. I believe in taking this time day by day and realising what is most important in life. A time to live in a way that reflects your values.

Sending good wishes to everyone who reads this post and I hope you stay well and are able to find ways to live your life in a way that brings you contentment during this difficult time the world finds itself in.

Kay

Embracing 60 – surprise party and the value of blogging

30 December 201531 December 2015 / Waves and Pebbles - random thoughts and writing on life, memories and creativity / 2 Comments

I had no doubt I wanted to share this photo but I pondered the title. Yes it was my sixtieth birthday recently. I’d been very specific about my age when I was in hospital over the past year and they had me down at one stage as 60 – NO! I said, I’m not 60, I’m 59 – a big difference in my eyes, fiftties sounds younger, sixties sounds, well, old.

So here I am, 60 and proud of it. It’s a fact, it’s a number. But does it really mean anything? I opened a card just the other day from a fairly new friend who had never known my age. She couldn’t help adding a comment to the card that we had chatted, shared things and experiences together, laughed and more and she couldn’t believe I was the age I was and said it proves age is just a number. I don’t know her age. Somewhere between 30’s and 40’s. Does it matter? What matters is that we clicked, we get on well together, she always makes me smile. She said I was an inspiration but she inspires me. We inspire each other, what can be better than that – peer inspiration, the best.

After the difficult year I have had, I felt blessed to reach my 60th and even more so when a surprise birthday celebration was arranged by my close family. I had an inkling that we were going to do something, I thought a small family meal out together somewhere. I was urged to be ready in time and was frantically trying to get my Christmas gift of earrings from a friend through my ears that I had not done for nearly a year, didn’t even know if the holes would still be there. Success and then I made my way out the door to be greeted by a huge white limousine.

It was a wonderful surprise and I sat sipping a taster of Champagne as I floated in the car to our destination. It seemed unreal. In my mind I kept thinking I knew where we were going as we took different turnings and changed my guess as we went past. We ended up arriving at one of my favourite haunts some years back where we spent many happy times, a fairly local hotel where I had partied, had family brunches with Santa and enjoyed the therapeutic benefits of the health spa. After capturing our family group outside the limo, I ventured inside, not prepared for the surprises that moment by moment dawned on me. Some of my closest friends who had supported me so much during the past year were already seated in the lounge area, scattered so it took me a few minutes to take it in and tears of emotion and joy escaped my eyes. It couldn’t have been more perfect. How they had all managed to keep it from me at a time when we were wishing each other a Happy Christmas and not expecting to see each other until the New Year I do not know. I never suspected such a surprise. It brought a warm glow to my heart and I treasured every moment.

I have dwelt on this more than I intended and it is hard to express in words how I felt. I had not felt able to make plans myself because I had not long had my last treatment of chemotherapy and was still recovering, and somehow it being the last of the cycle made it more difficult though I should have been pleased. As I write this I have enjoyed a joyous Christmas at home and spent a couple of days away at a family party where most of my family were present and I met once again with the youngest member, just under a year old, my niece’s son.

I would never have imagined years ago that at age 60 (which always seemed so old when I recall my own parents reaching that age) that I would have a teenage daughter and be mid-way through a degree course at University. I have a wonderful family, dear friends and a range of interests that keep me happy most of the time. There are challenges ahead but there is so much to be thankful for. I am returning to study in January and this will bring its own pressures which will again mean that my blogging will no doubt go on hold again, but it is not something that I want to let go of. It is something that I want to return to again and again as there is something so special about it. I have tinkered with different aspects of social media. Each has its place, benefits and downfalls, but to me nothing gets near to what blogging can do. It opens up a whole new world and the opportunities are endless. Whenever I come on here I get lost in what I am doing and never feel that I have wasted my time. There is always something that draws me in to read more and I know that it is always there for me if I need it.

Possessions, memories and how to approach clutterless living unique to you

7 July 20157 July 2015 / Waves and Pebbles - random thoughts and writing on life, memories and creativity / 2 Comments

Copyright 2015, Cajsa Lilliehook, Flickr, CC-BY-SA, via Wylio

Following on from my last post on Selfness, here is another piece of draft writing from the same book (self-development/coaching).

‘Clutterless < — > Tidyness

I have had a long struggle with ‘clutter’ – I hold on to things for too long that I may never need. I now recognise that there is little value in this, apart from saving a few pennies or pounds in the distant future at the expense of living a cluttered existence. If there is too much clutter, housework takes too long and becomes an unwelcome chore.

There has been much written on being clutterfree but some of this can be over-the-top, and lead to having a de-personalised space which is great for a showhouse but is it really a home?

At one time, I felt rebellious about clutterbusting. Having had to downsize, I had no option than to sell or dispose of many items, some of which I still have regrets about. Thankfully I did not rid myself completely of some of the smaller boxes containing various bits and pieces. I later went through these and as I picked up a piece, I would recall a special person or time in my life. Having a poor memory for some things, these triggers are invaluable and I am so thankful that I still have them in my life.

The key is to achieve a balance between possessions and space, with each possession having a place. This leads to being clutterless (as opposed to clutterfree), keeps the space tidy and results in a personalised environment that is special to you.

Periodically I enjoy spending time sifting through a selection of my possessions to check that I still want to keep them, or to organise them in a better way. This works for me. I have found that by decorating a room in a way that brings me pleasure, then choosing storage solutions that complement that environment, I am able to keep the things that I love in a way that adds to my contentment in my home.

My problem is that I still buy things and bring them into the home. I get pleasure from browsing in charity shops and strolling round boot fairs, disastrous for adding to clutter! But I enjoy it, and therefore my sifting has become a regular occurrence to keep balance within the home. The benefits are that this process can be done mindfully. (A topic for another post.)

Here are a few tips for becoming clutterless:

Spend random times – perhaps in the evenings or at week-ends – going through a shelf, drawer or cupboard. What works for me, if I am not motivated but want to sort something out, is to set a timer for 20 minutes and make an agreement with myself that after 20 minutes I can be done. Oftentimes I am by then enjoying myself and get lost in the task, carrying on longer and achieving more, with a sense of satisfaction from the end result.
Draw up your own criteria for keeping things. My own is that an item either gives pleasure, is useful now or within the next year, has memories or some other reason that I can justify to myself for keeping it. Books are my downfall – yet they are such treasures. Also clothes. I do hold on to a lot of clothes, even though I apply the sifting process, but if they are well-organised then I don’t see it as a problem.
Decide what storage you want and get it. It doesn’t have to cost a lot. There are lots of cheap shelving options out there, or colourful boxes and filing systems. The choice is yours. I have a bed with wonderful drawers which take a surprising amount.
Question what you are keeping ‘because it may be of use some day’. My experience is that it is the things with memories, special things that people have given me, that I have missed. Those without memories are soon forgotten, and if you don’t need them then the likelihood is that you will not miss them. Amongst my regrets are my food mixer and food processor that I had for many years. I was in for a shock when I saw the replacement cost. So, think twice before sifting too far!
Think about what you really enjoy in your life. Consider your values and keep the things that enhance your life. Let go of those you will never use and just leave you with feelings of guilt that you should have done something with them.

Accept your level of clutterlessness and enjoy.’

This piece was written a few years back. If you have read my recent post on Clutter-busting, it will be clear that I have not completely solved the clutter problem. It remains something which varies according to my health, energy and motivation.

At the risk of sounding a bit weird, a conversation and youtube watching session with my daughter on shopping hauls gave me the idea of playing around with my new computer videoing a garage book haul. I took a block of ten books off my shelf unit in my garage and recorded myself going through them and talking about them and what I found interesting. I was hoping that by doing this I would at least find something that I no longer wanted. I was wrong … it just reinforced my choice to keep them. And the potential youtube video? It was a learning experience – for a start it was too slow, I was swinging to and fro on my chair – very distracting – and it seemed so false! There’s certainly work to be done if I want to join my daughter in becoming a youtuber (something she wants to do but not yet and would be great if we could both get involved).

By the way, for those that have read my post on Clutter-busting, as part of my garage plan I was researching the cost of skips at the week-end only to find that local skip hire companies are exceptionally secretive about their fees meaning that a few phone calls were needed. Well today I contacted some and was slightly horrified at the cost. Then I looked at the van hire and somehow the skip seemed more appealing. However, even just working out that plan got me motivated to make a start on sorting the garage out, even if it wasn’t according to the plan I devised. I’ve made a start on working through it.

As a last thought, I think being part of this blogging community is really helping to motivate and inspire me. When it comes to the home, I particularly like Le Zoe Musings which has such beautiful photos which include a selection of closet solutions. Blogging has opened up a whole new world to me at a time when the world might otherwise have seemed to be getting smaller.

Clutter-busting … I woke as if in a dream and came up with a plan on how to empty my garage in 4 easy steps

4 July 20154 July 2015 / Waves and Pebbles - random thoughts and writing on life, memories and creativity / Leave a comment

Copyright 2008, Shane Gorski, Flickr, CC-BY-ND, via Wylio

Suddenly I was awake and felt startled. I had been dreaming – I can’t recall what about now but it felt very real. Now it was light and I thought I had overslept. We would be late for school. I jumped up and looked outside. No activity. Gradually it dawned on me that it was Saturday. Relief swept over me and I relaxed.

Isn’t it strange how, when you get up first thing in the morning, suddenly a problem that’s been hanging over you just suddenly pops into your mind and a potential solution materialises in your thoughts that had never occurred to you before? This was what happened to me this morning so I quickly penned a bullet point plan in case it flew away as quickly as it had landed.

I have a garage-full of ‘stuff’ that needs to be sorted and have either not had the motivation, space, resources or energy to deal with it. It has been there in the background on a ‘to do’ list. Vague discussions with family about taking action one week-end and clearing it, and one attempt about two years ago when we were not quite ready to dispose of the jumbled child equipment and activities, has meant that it still looms behind the doorway.

It is a block to sorting out my life. The remnants of the past. Reminders of good times. At the moment I am on a role. Despite my inability to go very far, being at home has meant that things are gradually happening, I have had the time to focus, make those calls, and get things done.

My eyes have become clearer since being on the verge of becoming a compulsive hoarder a few years ago while suffering from depression. I think I stopped in time. I took stock of the pile of old books that was building before me from addictive visits to charity shops, second hand bookshops and boot fairs. I became fired up to take them to a charity shop that supported a local church where there are memories of my mother. I filled bag after bag and there was a feeling of satisfaction when I delivered them in bulk to the charity shop, knowing that they were going to a good cause that in addition had a link with my mum.

One of the problems is I don’t just want to chuck things away that someone else would benefit from but there is so much (though of no particular value now). We did spend time a couple of years back re-organising the garage. We got rid of the most useless and discovered the odd hidden treasure. Nowadays I sort things into rubbish and charity piles and it goes nowhere near the garage (well, to be honest it’s piled too high now) but the boot of my car is full of items ready to go to charity or recycling that has still not got there.

So … the plan that popped into my head, which may seem very obvious but has never occurred to me before, is to hire a large van big enough to take everything and be able to sort it out inside. We could then take it to a boot fair so that if it could be of use to anyone, then that is an opportunity. Whatever is left can then either go to charity or be disposed of as recycling or rubbish. I have tried selling a few bits online but for me it is a long process, with little reward, and not one that I particularly enjoy after the first feeling of novelty.

So, the plan to clear a garage full of stuff is:

1. Hire a large van for the week-end.
2. Transfer the stuff from the garage to the van, filtering out the obvious rubbish.
3. Go to a boot fair.
4. Remainder goes to (a) charity (b) recycling (c) rubbish

I had thought of a having a skip, but I couldn’t deal with creating a heap of rubbish from many past gifts and memories in such a way. I have seen the delight at a boot fair when a child excitedly finds something that they really want at that moment and my plan encompasses this. However, I will check out the cost of a skip compared with my plan above and make a decision.

So when my garage is empty? Well there are some things in the spare bedroom that we want to keep … and underneath the stairs … on top of my wardrobe … under the bed … in the garden … NO!!!! it’s not going to happen. The garage started off as a place to create, floored and walled, with table and chairs. We even decorated it out and had Christmas Dinner in it one year. Maybe a new use will pop into my head that will inspire me. Anything is possible if you focus and believe it can be done.