Embracing 60 – surprise party and the value of blogging

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I had no doubt I wanted to share this photo but I pondered the title.  Yes it was my sixtieth birthday recently.  I’d been very specific about my age when I was in hospital over the past year and they had me down at one stage as 60 – NO! I said, I’m not 60, I’m 59 – a big difference in my eyes, fiftties sounds younger, sixties sounds, well, old.

So here I am, 60 and proud of it.  It’s a fact, it’s a number.  But does it really mean anything?  I opened a card just the other day from a fairly new friend who had never known my age.  She couldn’t help adding a comment to the card that we had chatted, shared things and experiences together, laughed and more and she couldn’t believe I was the age I was and said it proves age is just a number.  I don’t know her age.  Somewhere between 30’s and 40’s.  Does it matter?  What matters is that we clicked, we get on well together, she always makes me smile.  She said I was an inspiration but she inspires me.  We inspire each other, what can be better than that – peer inspiration, the best.

After the difficult year I have had, I felt blessed to reach my 60th and even more so when a surprise birthday celebration was arranged by my close family.  I had an inkling that we were going to do something, I thought a small family meal out together somewhere.  I was urged to be ready in time and was frantically trying to get my Christmas gift of earrings from a friend through my ears that I had not done for nearly a year, didn’t even know if the holes would still be there.  Success and then I made my way out the door to be greeted by a huge white limousine.

It was a wonderful surprise and I sat sipping a taster of Champagne as I floated in the car to our destination.  It seemed unreal.  In my mind I kept thinking I knew where we were going as we took different turnings and changed my guess as we went past.  We ended up arriving at one of my favourite haunts some years back where we spent many happy times, a fairly local hotel where I had partied, had family brunches with Santa and enjoyed the therapeutic benefits of the health spa.  After capturing our family group outside the limo, I ventured inside, not prepared for the surprises that moment by moment dawned on me.  Some of my closest friends who had supported me so much during the past year were already seated in the lounge area, scattered so it took me a few minutes to take it in and tears of emotion and joy escaped my eyes.  It couldn’t have been more perfect.  How they had all managed to keep it from me at a time when we were wishing each other a Happy Christmas and not expecting to see each other until the New Year I do not know.  I never suspected such a surprise.  It brought a warm glow to my heart and I treasured every moment.

I have dwelt on this more than I intended and it is hard to express in words how I felt.  I had not felt able to make plans myself because I had not long had my last treatment of chemotherapy and was still recovering, and somehow it being the last of the cycle made it more difficult though I should have been pleased.  As I write this I have enjoyed a joyous Christmas at home and spent a couple of days away at a family party where most of my family were present and I met once again with the youngest member, just under a year old, my niece’s son.

I would never have imagined years ago that at age 60 (which always seemed so old when I recall my own parents reaching that age) that I would have a teenage daughter and be mid-way through a degree course at University.  I have a wonderful family, dear friends and a range of interests that keep me happy most of the time.  There are challenges ahead but there is so much to be thankful for.  I am returning to study in January and this will bring its own pressures which will again mean that my blogging will no doubt go on hold again, but it is not something that I want to let go of.  It is something that I want to return to again and again as there is something so special about it.  I have tinkered with different aspects of social media.  Each has its place, benefits and downfalls, but to me nothing gets near to what blogging can do.  It opens up a whole new world and the opportunities are endless.  Whenever I come on here I get lost in what I am doing and never feel that I have wasted my time.  There is always something that draws me in to read more and I know that it is always there for me if I need it.

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Chatham Maritime – a different view September 2015

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

I’m now catching up on what I’ve done over the past couple of months when enjoying the freedom to go out and about in my car and on the train.  These are photos taken at Chatham Maritime, just round the corner from the Chatham Dockside outlet shopping centre, Dickensworld tourist attraction, Odeon cinema, restaurants, coffee shops and an ice cream cafe which apparently is well-worth the queueing, and lots more besides.  If you are interested in learning more about the area take a look at Chatham Maritime Trust’s site.  The Trust is a registered charity and guardian of the Chatham Maritime Estate which has lots of history.

Beyond the boats, which can be seen in the photo below, is St Mary’s Island.  This island is very small and filled with modernish residential houses.  The island inspired one of my poems which was a bit gloomy and in no way represents what I think of the island.  I thought I had shared the poem before but on checking don’t think I have so when I find it, I’ll share it.

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

I never used to visit the Island until a couple of years ago when a friend told me they often went there for walks.  I had seen no sign of anywhere much to walk but one day was determined to find it.  I parked on the island and eventually managed to slip through a footpath between houses which took me onto the perimeter pathway.  From there I was right beside the river estuary (if that’s the right way to describe it – never one for geography).  It was a beautiful sunny day and I wish I had the photos to show you here.  As I walked around, the high fencing/walls beside the path hid the houses and all that could be seen was the path and the beautiful views of shimmering water and bobbing colourful boats.  It seemed to have taken me to a magical place that I never knew existed, it didn’t feel like the Medway I knew – another hidden gem.  Walking further round to one end I came across an amazing massive sculpture, the Mariners, which was to mean more to me in the future – more on this in another blog.  Here is the link to the sculptor Sam Holland’s website.

I am to-ing and fro-ing a bit in time, but I wanted to share how worthwhile it is – if you find yourself near Chatham Maritime and St Mary’s Island – to stop off and take some time out for yourself.  There are two bridges which go across to the Island, one where the cars go and one where there is a lock, and this is the best route to the pathway from Dockside (though watch out for the parking restrictions).

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

The pictures shown here do not do the area justice but they are a reminder to me of the day I visited.  I can’t walk far so stopped off by the pub and visited the Co-op supermarket.  The cool breeze is always so refreshing and lifts my spirits.  The pub the Ship & Trades is a great meeting place and – unlike here – is often very busy with a convivial atmosphere.  I can thoroughly recommend the food and they are always very helpful with meeting special dietary requirements.

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

The following photo is one of my attempts at having a different perspective and I liked the way the shapes made geometric patterns.  I sort of like it.  Now I’m off to see what other photos I can share with you.  Kay

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

Copyright 2015 Kay Underdown/wavesandpebbles

Mum’s Legendary Chocolate Cake

Love this post and Anna’s blog, especially the letter to her mother which you will find if you visit her blog. Kay

Anna Buckley's avatarAnna Buckley

IMG_7338[1]It’s moist, sticky, irresistibly chocolaty, ridiculously easy to bake and is even yummier the next day!

August is the month where all those Christmas party conceptions come to bear. Nearly every day we seem to be celebrating the birthday of a family member or close friend. We don’t go much on gift giving excesses but we do like to celebrate these special days with food and more specifically Mum’s chocolate birthday cake.

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Healthy Diet or Healthy Eating – are they one and the same?

Copyright 2015 Kay/wavesandpebbles

Copyright 2015 Kay/wavesandpebbles

When I was setting up my Waves and Pebbles Facebook Page, it is possible to select interests to show what groups of people you would like to see your page.    What was fascinating is that in the process of doing so, the numbers of people who have expressed an interest in specific things is shown.

I found it startling that 22,554,479 people expressed an interest in “Healthy Diet” against just 34,552 in “Healthy Eating”.  It may be that it was their own choice of wording for their interests.  However, regardless of what is behind the figures,  it got me thinking about the different perceptions of “healthy eating” and “healthy diet”.  Are they one and the same?

For me, “healthy diet” brings to mind trying to lose weight and implies some kind of planning of menus, whereas “healthy eating” is about having knowledge about what is healthy or not (or at least supposed to be) and eating a balanced diet which includes all the nutrients that the body requires.  I believe that healthy eating is the key to losing weight, as once a diet comes into the equation the mind can become obsessed with thinking about food and wanting to eat things that are banned on “the diet”.  I know that in my twenties being on different diets was a big part of my life, as it was for my friends, until I did eventually lose the weight I wanted and stayed that way for many years (through healthy eating).

I’d be interested to hear what others think.  (I’ll copy this onto my Healthy Eating Forum page https://wavesandpebbles.wordpress.com/healthy-eating-forum/.)

Beauty amongst Chaos (2) – Slideshow and memories of mum’s gardening

In my last post, I mentioned that my garden needs a lot of work done and it is just not going to happen this year.  Despite this, I do love flowers and plants.  My mum loved gardening and I was brought up with beautiful gardens.  When I had my own home, she used to love coming round and planting summer bedding for me.  Often, apart from winter, whenever I visited mum and dad they were busy out in the garden.  Mum would be on her knees digging, weeding and planting.  She kept this up for most of her life till sadly she had Alzheimers and eventually went into a nursing home.  I returned last year to the home where I spent most of my childhood.  I walked slowly past and the garden still showed the loving labours of my parents when they landscaped the land, putting in different levels, a pond, walls, paths, steps and crazy paving.

I decided to have a go at putting some photos I took of my garden nursery haul into a slide show.  I believe that no matter how difficult things are, beauty can be found in life, no matter how small, in amongst the complex nature of our lives.